So there is alot of conversation on Ravelry about babies, there seems to be alot of women who are pregnant and I am one of them. I am terrified and here is my story of why.
I went into labor on a Monday night, by Tuesday morning I was in the hospital barely dilated, though I was a week and a half overdue. They gave me some pitocin among other things and had me wait it out. A day later (and the night was terrible, and not even because of the contractions but because I would moan every 15 minutes half awake and my mother woke me up to ask me to be a little more quiet, how is that for shades of my childhood), they broke my water, gave me an epidural and everything froze. I was only 3cm dilated and they went to far with the epidural and gave me a spinal tap instead. My daughter and my blood pressures began to plummet, everything began to go all dizzy like. I did get numb from the chest down. My husband magically appeared, after not being there this whole time, and they rushed me into an emergency c-section. Why do you have to hold your arms out like your on a cross? That is so uncomfortable and I just wanted to bring them in. Anyway, they took out my daughter, she barely cried (because she was busy pooping rofl) and sealed me up, sending me to recovery. While in recovery they kept asking me if I had a headache, to make sure I wasn't going to be paralyzed, and eventually feeling came back in my lower body again.
This time they are supposedly doing a scheduled c-section and if anyone has a problem with doing a scheduled c-section after the way my body did not cooperate with labor last time, they can kiss my ass.
I'm sick, I'm tired, I'm depressed, I just want to nap and tell everyone to leave me the fuck alone. Instead, I have to be at work, dealing with things I don't really care for. I really need a nap. So that is why I'm terrified.. I thought I was frightened before.. but after knowing what could go wrong? Luckily my daughter and I are fine and she'll be 4 this year by the time the baby is born, or soon after.
Goddess give me strength, I sure as hell need it.